Top 5 Comedywire Jokes of the Day: Vodka, Sex Robots, and Rockets

 "Trump responds by saying they have gone from 9's to 5's. Sad!"-Robb

She also thought she would be president-Freddie Walker

2. Sex robot called Samantha goes on sale in UK and she's yours for £3,500

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I can't even afford a relationship with a fake female-Eric Eldridge

3. Truck overturns in North Carolina, loses 44,000 pounds of vodka

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He disinvited Golden State, but the rockets may drop in.-Jeff Sawyer

5. Mexican Modeling Agency Cancels Male Beauty Contest. Can't Find Handsome Candidates

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They should do what Hollywood does when they need a handsome Mexican. Use white people.-Daniel Bradley