Top 5 Comedywire Jokes of the Day: Birth Control, Divorce, and Uranus

 "Trump responds by saying they have gone from 9's to 5's. Sad!"-Robb

"In a related story, the Maury Povich Show has been picked up for another 30 seasons."-Sam Gregory

2. Mouthpiece Claims To Turn Polluted Air Into Clean, Mineral-Infused Air

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"It also turns your friends into people who no longer want to be seen in public with you."-Jen Lap

3. A Bodily Fluid Could Soon Power Our Phones

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"Just when you thought Apple couldn't possibly exploit their sweatshop workers any more."-Mike Voss

4. Hubble just spotted something massive coming out of Uranus

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"Upon close inspection, scientists believe it's an "obvious joke."-Nick Jack Pappas

5. Divorce Runs In The Family, Claims New Study

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"The gene is passed along the Ex Chromosome"-Steve Wampus Reynolds